Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.

Proverbs 13:12. NIV

Heartbreak is a painful emotional experience an individual encounters after the breakup of a love relationship. It’s a feeling some persons find it hard to overcome because they invested all their emotions in the relationship, hoping the relationship will end well.

For some, they find it hard to love another because the memory of the relationship and the breakup is still fresh in their mind, more like the memory still hunt them.

Only those you love can hurt you.

As an individual undergoing heartbreak experience, you need to learn how to deal with it to regain yourself back because if you don’t, it may end up becoming an emotional pattern and hindrances to you later on in life.

There are some proven steps that will naturally help you to over heartbreak experience.



One of the reason some people find it hard to overcome the pains of heartbreak, is because everything still looks like a dream to them because they never expected the outcome to be what it is.

Accept the fact that the person you love has broken up with you even though it’s painful, that’s the first major step to take to overcome the experience.


Another practical step to take is treating everything you both shared as a thing of the past.

I know the relationship was colorful, lovely and full of wonderful memories but for your own peace of mind, convince yourself that all that beautiful experiences are now in the past. Because if you don’t do that, you will wallow in pains when the other person is probably enjoying his or her life somewhere else.

So all the beautiful things you do to show that you care, put an end to them.

As long as you keep relating with your past, you can’t move forward emotionally.


Heartbreak will naturally want to make you shut yourself against the world because by then every reasonable thing won’t make sense and taking solace in the dark will be the next option to take, but that isn’t a wise decision!

Emotional healing is not in the dark!

So force yourself to move out and be among people who care about you because that’s the best thing to do at this point.

Some years ago, a lady who lived in my area back then took her own life because the guy she was in love with called off their wedding plans. She couldn’t withstand the pains, and one day she isolated herself from the people around her, and she hung herself.

One of the major reason you should avoid isolating yourself is nothing may sincerely make sense to you, and suicidal thoughts may creep into your mind.

So do everything you can to avoid being isolated. Take some vacation, travel to spend some time with your family or friends, so they will help distract your mind because your peace of mind should be paramount to you.


You should try everything possible to regain your sanity at all costs.

“While working at federal medical center, Makurdi, Benue State, Nigeria, at the psychiatric department, I heard a story of one young man who went insane because of heartbreak, and they admitted him in the psychiatric department, and it restored his sanity. After a while he fell in love with another lady, and they were planning their wedding, but along the line someone told the lady of the guy’s medical history, and the lady called off the wedding arrangements. The guy couldn’t withstand the shock of everything, and he went insane again for the second time, and they admitted him again in the psychiatric department”.

Regaining your sanity should be your top priority at this point because if you are not help emotionally, and because peaceful mentally, it may affect your decision making regarding your next relationship.

How to regain your sanity

  • Hangout With Your Friends: In a moment like this, you need to avoid being isolated because that’s what the sad feeling will want you to do and you shouldn’t obey such feeling but go out to spend time with your friends. The more your mind is distracted from the pains, the faster you heal up. This is one reason I often counsel people not to discard their friends: because they are dating someone, because such a decision can hurt them badly later. If you avoid all your friends because of someone whose shoulder will you lean on if you find yourself in such a situation?

  • Talk To Yourself: I discovered that talking positive things to yourself helps a lot in situations like this because it helps in repositioning your mind and emotions. Instead of crying and complaining, move to the mirror, admire how lovely God created you, then speak words of encouragement and healing to yourself. The more you speak to yourself, the more your ears listen to those words, and the better you become.

  • Avoid environment that reminds you: In a moment like this, consciously avoid environment that will make you think of the person always. Also avoid listening to cool songs or blues that will make you think or shed tears. “Back then in the university, a friend of mine back then was seriously in love with a lady, but along the line, the lady got married to another guy and it broke my guy’s heart, and it affected every part of him. Every night, my friend will drown himself in one of these cool rock songs and all he was thinking about was this lady”. Blues music is wonderful but at this point of your life, avoid it at all costs even if it’s a gospel song because it may likely drown you into much emotional pains.


During break up, the person who loves and cares more is the one who gets hurt the most, and still the one who finds it hard to let go. Even when heart broken, they still want to show some care to the one who broke their heart.

For the fact you don’t want to see them get hurt, you unconsciously give them advice even when they’ve begun a new relationship. Such care is excellent, but at this point it’s a risk to you.

Your communication level with your ex partner should drop to the minimum level with no form of remorse. You shouldn’t call and to a large extent don’t pick his or her calls because it will help you recover.

Put an end to every form of care at this point because showing care to someone who broken your heart will do nothing but deepen the emotional pains in your heart.

You need to preserve the little piece of you remaining.

If you continue with such act, the pain my deepens to where it will become too hard for you to overcome because you will think about that person often, and that’s not good for you. Let go of the person completely by showing no form of care for your own good.

I trust God this piece of information was helpful to you, and if it does, please do well to comment and follow this page below.

Thank You!

Post a Comment



Copyright (c) 2021 Abraham Orogun All Right Reserved