TWELVE WAYS TO IDENTIFY GENUINE LOVE..

TWELVE WAYS TO IDENTIFY GENUINE LOVE.




Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:13 (NLT)


Love is one of the sweetest things created by God, it’s the comforting force in an unhappy soul.

Life becomes peaceful and worth living in a surrounding where love lives.

For love, God gave us his son, and for that same love, his son died and rose from the grave to establish love between God and man.

For the sake of love, a man can sacrifice his time, money and all his material possessions just to entreat the one he is passionately in love with.

Have you ever wondered what earth would have been if there was nothing like love? It would have been a place completely ruled by chaos, pains and heartaches.

The search for love is one adventure of man, and not just for love itself, but for the love to be genuine.

There’s a common question in the atmosphere with relationship matters, and that question is “Does Genuine Love Exist”? You can’t confidently answer that question without first knowing what love is.

What is love?

Love is the powerful connection between two or most people, often with the opposite sex based on a choice couple with actions.

Oxford Languages defined love as an intense feeling of deep affection.

Love is not just an emotion because feelings can fade away when what prompted that feelings dies off.

Love is a connection born out of a firm decision, and that decision is backed up with action.

We don’t feel to love; we choose to love.


Love isn’t just a word but a strong word that’s deeply rooted, not in feelings or emotions but in decision. It’s one of the binding forces that holds a relationship together when the excitement is no more.

So if we build a relationship between emotions, the end of such a relationship is risky because emotions can be tricky.

What is likeness?

Likeness is the natural attraction you have for something or someone. Something you see on someone or something can trigger this attraction.

Difference between love and likeness!

Love at first sight isn’t correct or true because what happened at the point of sight is “Likeness” and not love. Love is a deep word born out of a deep experience, and this depth can’t occur in an instant.

When someone asks if genuine love exists, what that person is asking is, can I be love the way I want to be loved?

Does True Love Exist?

Yes, genuine love exists, and it’s real. The fact it looks rare, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.

We only have people who don’t know what love is and apply it the right way.

Let’s look at the 12 ways to identify genuine love below!

1. Love Accepts:

One of the most proving factors of love is ACCEPTANCE.

The first thing love does when it approaches anyone is to accept you just the way you are irrespective of your shortcomings, past, present or future.

I have noticed that you will never see the beauty or know the better side of anyone until you accept the person just the way they are.

Most times the reason complains and fault finding prevails in a relationship is because one party is yet to accept the other party just the way he or she is. And until acceptance gains ground fully in your relationship, complaining and fault finding will continue and end up drowning the relationship completely.

The fact someone accepts you the way you are doesn’t mean you should remain like that. Grow!





2. It encourages Growth and Maturity:

Building a relationship shouldn’t be for fun but for self development.

Love should offer us the opportunity to grow and become stronger than where we are coming from.


What is the need of entering a relationship when it has no impact on my personal life?

Of what use it will be when it doesn’t offer me the opportunity to be better than my past?

Genuine love always provokes personal growth.


Love isn’t selfish or self seeking, but seeks to improve the life who possesses it.

So if I say I love you, I am indirectly saying your self development is my concern. I may not actively sponsor your growth financially, but I should be able to encourage you and create the atmosphere for you to grow peacefully.

Also, when you say you love someone, you need to make yourself better for your partner, and for yourself daily.

Over the years I have counselled some persons whose relationship ended in shame. During the counseling, I discovered they invested in their partner and failed to invest in themselves. So over time their partner grew out of their level, and the relationship became history.

As you develop yourself, carry your partner along.


3. Love Promotes Self-Love:

Love has a way of making you feel good about yourself and increase your self-worth and confidence.

When you are loved the right way, given the freedom of being yourself, it affects how you feel about yourself. But when you are always treated with an iron fist, it weakens your confidence and most times can make you develop an inferior personality trait. So you need to be mindful of who you date.

Genuine love creates the environment for the individual to feel good about him or herself.

So a relationship that deprives you the opportunity of feeling good won’t last long.



4. It encourages Selflessness:

It’s so funny seeing certain people who profess love, but it only looks like an imaginary expression.

Love is selfless, putting the needs of others before its own. When I say I love you, I’m equally saying your heart's desires comes before mine.

You can’t say you love someone and you are most concerned about yourself without thinking about the other person. That’s not love, but selfishness!

5. It encourages Patience:

Patience is hard, but it’s the prevailing factor of love.

Love teaches the heart to be patient. If you love someone, you will be patient at his or her dealings with you.

6. It encourages friendship:

Have you noticed that it’s easier to relate to the person you love? I’m sure your answer will be a yes.

Love will always strive to build and strengthen the bond of friendship in a relationship because there will always be a propelling force in your heart, pushing you to call, send a message, visit or to see the person you love just to relate with the person. And the more you relate, the stronger the friendship becomes.

The need for friendship can never be overemphasized in a relationship because that is one thing that keeps love in the relationship together. When the excitement in the relationship feels threatened, the established friendship will be what will bring you both together.




7. It encourages freedom of expression:

Freedom is one of the ingredients of love. You can’t be in love and still feel you are in bondage or in slavery.

In love, you have the liberty to be yourself, the freedom to express yourself fully without the fear of being restricted.

One thing that makes it easy to build the bond of friendship in a relationship is the freedom of expression. It’s easier to build friendship or communicate with your partner when you are free to be yourself around your partner.

I remember talking to a lady sometime ago who felt so frustrated in her relationship because the guy she was dating didn’t give her the freedom to be herself. Any little thing she does irritates him, and whenever she feels like playing with him jokingly, he always reacts negatively to it.

A relationship where there’s no freedom of expression, love naturally loses its value.




8. It promotes Humility:

You can’t be arrogant towards the person you love because love will naturally humble you.

You can’t claim to be in love and arrogance is your watchword, such isn’t love.

Your spouse or partner can’t talk to you, because you just want only your decision must be heard and taken.

Love brings one down to the level of the other, making everyone equal. Love promotes equality in relationships!

When one suddenly becomes or feels higher than the other, breakup is fast approaching.


9. It encourages commitment:

Commitment is one sign to show that love is real because you are naturally committed to what you love.

Commitment is seen in four Ways.

  • Communication: When you are committed to someone, it will show in your level of communication towards that person. You can’t claim to be in love and not have the desire to talk to the person always.
  • Attention: When you are in a relationship, the person has access to your time, and attention, and you have the person’s attention and time.
    You can’t be too busy for the person you love, there will always be a desire your heart to spend time with the person.
  • Sacrifice: Another proof of commitment in a relationship is that making of sacrifice becomes easy.
    You can’t say your heart is with someone in a relationship and you can’t sacrifice your time or money for that which you love.
  • Support: If I am committed to you, I should be able to support your dreams emotionally, intellectually, spiritually and otherwise.
    You can’t erase support from commitment because support reveals the depth of commitment.




10. It promotes self-control:

Love isn’t wild, neither is it arrogant in expression, it operates within its boundary, and that boundary is as SELF-CONTROL.

When you look at the fruit of the Spirit in the book of Galatians 5:22-23, it began with love and ended with self-control. God didn’t make a mistake arranging it that way because any love that lacks control is questionable.

Any love that lacks control becomes abusive.


You can’t claim to be in love and you quickly get angry and hit the one the person.

Love gives you the will to control yourself and not give in, in moments of conflicts.

11. Love Protects:

One sign to show one is in love, is the eagerness to want to protect his or her partner from harm, no matter the level of the harm.

If someone claims to be in love with you, and the person isn’t careful about his or her words or actions around you, not minding if it hurts you or not, that love is questionable.

Protection is strong in an environment where love lives.




12. Love Corrects:

Just the way love takes pleasure in protecting, it also takes pleasure in correcting.

You can’t say you love someone and you can’t correct the person when he or she makes a mistake. The bible said that open rebuke is better than secret love (Proverbs 27:5).

Take your time and go through the 12 ways to identify genuine love and digest it properly to know what to look out for when next love knocks at your door.

Please do well to comment on other ways not listed out to identify genuine love, and if you have questions, please ask in the comment section.

Please do well to share and follow this page. Thank you!

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